4.+Clinical+Aspects+(oo888)

 Legionnaire’s disease is a non-contagious disease caused by the bacteria found in water systems. This disease is mostly caused by Legionella pneumophilia which mostly occur all through winter months. Moreover (this part is a repetition of what was said by your colleagues), the symptoms of this disease are often variable (Kirrage et al, 2003) Hence, there are various symptoms of Legionnaire’s disease and high fever is the earliest signs of the illness in which the disease appears 2 to 10days after it has been exposed to the bacteria causing the disease. (poorly written, needs better wording)
 * __Clinical aspects of Legionnaire’s disease __**

Fig1 : Onset dates of Symptoms of Legionella infection of patients in wales from July 2010 to September 2010 ( Kemarou. M and Evans .M.R , 2010). The figure above indicated that the onset dates of symptoms was ranged from 4th of august to september 2010 it isn't the period that is important but the length of time, I believe you are giving an overview of symptoms development? in which none of the patients in the community was known to have travelled as at that time. Other main symptoms of the Legionnaires disease are Loss of energy, coughing of blood, gastrointestinal symptoms as such as diarrhoea, nausea, vomiting and abdominal pain (Magnussen.M,2004), general discomfort, shortness of breathe, Loss of energy, shaking chills, joint pain, muscle aches, stiffness and chest pain (Swartz.M, 1979 ). The high fever is due to the bacteria (aren't all symptoms due to bacteria infection?) that caused the illness in which the time at which the patient is exposed to bacteria for this illness is shorter and is few hours to 2days compare to the time at which the patient is exposed to bacteria and beginning of the illness which is about 2 to 10days. The headache and muscle pain is due to symptoms of Pontiac fever, but because of the doubts of the definition and pathogenesis of Pontiac fever people with mild legionnaires are also suspected to have Pontiac fever.  Shortness of breath in patient with legionnaire’s disease is due to lungs problem because the bacteria spreads to the chest and tighten the chest which causes shortness of breath. Loss of energy may be due to depression and tiredness which weakens the patient and causes total discomfort while cough is due to the lungs infection and is one of the main distinctive symptoms (Guayard et al, 2011). **Conclusion ** In general, the symptoms of Legionnaires disease have several symptoms and are often variable, begins within 2 to 10days after being exposed to bacteria in which the symptoms disappears without being treated and causing any further problems. **References **
 * Cyril Guayard and Donald .E. Low, (2011), //Legionella //// infections and travel associated legionellosis, Science direct //, 9: 176-186.
 * Kemarou. M and Evans .M.R, (2010), //<span style="color: black; font-family: 'Cambria','serif'; font-size: 16px;">A community outbreak of Legionnaires’ disease in South Wales, August–September 2010 ////<span style="color: black; font-family: 'Cambria','serif'; font-size: 16px;">, //<span style="color: black; font-family: 'Cambria','serif'; font-size: 16px;">Eurosurveillance, 15: 1-4.
 * <span style="color: black; font-family: 'Cambria','serif'; font-size: 16px;">Morton .N and Swartz .M.D, (1979), //Clinical aspects of Legionnaire’s disease//, Annals of internal medicine. 90: 492-495.


 * <span style="color: black; font-family: 'Cambria','serif'; font-size: 16px;">Victor. L, Frank .J. Kroboth, John Shonnard, Arnold Brown, Sara McDearman and Margaret Magnussen, (2004), //<span style="color: black; font-family: 'Cambria','serif'; font-size: 16px;">Legionnaires' disease: New clinical perspectives from a prospective pneumonia study, Science direct //<span style="color: black; font-family: 'Cambria','serif'; font-size: 16px;">, 73: 357-361.

The work lacks of structure and it is poorly written, it is unclear in places and although the example in the figure could have been very interesting you have not been able to discuss it in depth or t make it relevant.